At that time, I began to understand how much Miriam suffered. I thought that the only thing I could do was to take myself out of any encounter with Jacques. And so, I did.
Looking back, that was the first mistake I made. I forced Jacques to transport me from the realm of the real into the realm of his imagination.
With my whole being out of his sight, I freed him to fall in love with me. More precisely to fall in love with a chimera resembling me; a chimera born from the richness and depths of his soul. I became his dream woman, precisely because I was not his woman.
I remember Angelo’s words, one warm autumn evening while we were walking through Place du Tertre watching the work of amateurish artists:
“My dear Clara, your cloistered behavior is ridiculous. It’s not helping at all.”
I retrospect I wish I would have listened to him.
Well, but later Miguel would say:
“Jacques fell in love with you the moment he saw you, Clara. Remember his words that winter evening…”
I remember the words that Jacques uttered that winter evening when we first met him. I always will.
I had a premonition
excerpt from the manuscript Glass Lovers